Photogenic!!

I would like to apologize for taking so long in posting. A combination of computer glitches, scheduling, and mass hysteria all played a part in this delay. LOL!!

Ryan had about a week there when he was feeling very well. He had no hiccups, fever, sweats, etc. It was amazing. Unfortunately the relief was short lived. All of those crazy symptoms are here again. Yet, he smiles through it all. He's tough as a "pine-knot" as my Granny would say.

Last week, Ryan underwent some tests to rule-out possible causes for many of these symptoms. The main concern was that there may be a tumor in his adrenal gland: which would explain much of his situation as of late. Firstly, there had to be a urinalysis to detect specific components to indicate this tumor. Those were found in his urine and hence he was sent for a CAT scan. Thank God, his CAT scan came back normal.

His physicians believe that these symptoms are indicative of an overall neurological decline, not a condition or illness that requires medications or specific treatment. So, we are back to square #1, relieved that he is not facing some crazy surgery, but hopeless that there is nothing we can do but enjoy every moment with him.

Did you see his pictures? The day that he was scheduled for the scan, Sis.F was scheduled to come and do some pictures in our home with the family. I called her and told her that we could do it another day. NO WAY! She came, in spite of half of us being in pajamas, the house upside down, and all of us waiting on the doctor's office to call.

She was as cool as a cucumber and did a beautiful job getting some great pictures. (But, I have to admit that I have some good-lookin' kids)It is just like God to send a sweet spirit into the house (Sis. F) to take our minds off the test and back on happier tokens. Thanks Friend!!

Ryan was not shaken in the least. Drama does not affect him at all. You can see in his pictures that he was happy as a lark. His face shows me that his soul is not troubled over any of this world's worries: his physical condition included.

That's my little buddy... Ain't he cute??? When you think of his little face, you smile too.

A Time of Uncertainty

So Wednesday has came and gone, and we are all still trying to work through our feelings.

Ryan did very well the whole day, and continues to be fine. For those who are curious or have been praying, Ryan's EEG came with some sobering results. Although he looked to be sleeping, the EEG showed a great deal of seizure activity. The symptoms that Ryan has been experiencing are due to problems with deteriorating brain function. His doctor also told us that he really did not feel optimistic about Ryan's overall neurological condition, and that his main objective at this point in time is to keep him comfortable.

So, now our main objective as a family is to have as much fun as we can with this sweet boy. Our house will undergo a transformation over the next few days to bring Ryan and all his needed equipment into the main room of the house. Daddy and I will camp out there with him at night.

We were blessed to have special friends over on Friday night and to spend the day with other friends on Saturday. Thanks for being there for Ryan and for us.
Everyday we will try to make memories. If you are interested in having some good times and special memories with this awesome little dude, JUST CALL OR BLOG!!

We're starting off today by being at services with our dearest friends: our church family. Everybody have a wonderful day. To God be the glory!! " Ryan is a winner either way. If he stays or if he goes, He's a winner either way!" Only our Heavenly Father knows what's in store for all of us, including Baby Ryan. Let's just trust in his infinite wisdom to do what is the best for Ryan.


P.S. Please pray for my other children during this time. They adore Ryan and will need extra strength to understand all that is going on around them.
Thank You... Mommie (Brother's Keeper)

Thank You, Lord

I hope you guys don't think I'm trying to pull at your sympathy or anything when I speak about Ryan, because that's not my desire at all.

But the devil tries to perplex me with this situation, you know, he tries to dig at me and tries to tell me that if God really loved me, He wouldn't allow Ryan to go through the things he goes through. And I would be a liar if I tried to tell you that the devil didn't do that. But I just want the devil to know that I thank the Lord anyway. And I know that God's got Ryan in His hands. I just have to learn to trust in the Lord and know that there's nothing really that I can do anyway.

I just want the Lord to know that sometimes even when my head's hanging down, that I love Him anyway and I thank Him anyway.

I wish I could put it into words what it's like to love someone so much that your gut just hurts, and then have to stand to the side and just watch. It's very hard, but I'm sure it's harder for Ryan than it is for me. But, I have to rest and know that God truly loves Ryan more than I ever could.

I just want to tell the Lord, "Thank you." I was told Ryan wouldn't even live, not even a year, and this year, he'll be thirteen. But even if he had only lived a year and a day, that would be more than what anyone expected.

I don't want God to ever think that I'm complaining about taking care of Ryan because it's been the most wonderful experience. And I'll say it until I leave this world, that watching him and seeing him in the state he's in and in a way that is helpless, it truly does show me my condition without my Father.

Lord, I just love you tonight and I'm sorry if I get upset and I'm sorry if I ask questions.

And I ask you guys to forgive me if I seem like I'm downtrodden sometimes, I still have joy in my heart and I still love God with everything in me.